At the moment life feels like one giant liminal phase that I will never exit out of. I feel a but unsure and a bit anxious about the next 6 months, and then the 6 months after that. I know I can change, and I know I can make good choices for myself. I guess I'm just being a bit of a doubting Debbie when it comes to trusting my intuition and feelings on where life is going. I prefer to be in control, of everything, all the time. To hang on for the ride and see where things take me and how the develope is especially hard. But I am trying. I am enjoying my work at my new job immensely. I love being able to help people with their questions, and I get so excited that I can express my passion at work. It really is fun. 

I need to get myself centered and focused and start cranking out my dissertation. I procrastinate because I am afraid of failing, and then I rush headlong toward the deadline with little sleep striving for perfection. I need to remember that I will never be fuly satisfied with anything I write, and to strive to produce the best that I can with what I have it enough. I am enjoying the research part of this project, now that I have actually got myself stuck into it, albeit 2-3 behind. I am finishing up this fantastic book called Green Pharmacy: The History and Evolution of Western Herbal Medicine by Barbara Griggs. Just as in politics and art, in medicine there appears to be a swinging pendulum of extremes with rare periods that fall in the middle. As much as I adore the Georgian & Victorian Eras, and even the Jazz Age and Belle Epoque, I am very glad that I was not born in a time where heavy metals, blood letting, and purging were thought to be the end all and be all of medicine. I highly recommend this book if you are at all interested in medical history, herbalisim, or the victorian era.

I'll leave you with a video of part of my morning ritual. I get up, make myself a big cup of black tea in my Alice in Wonderland mug, and stare out our kitchen windows into the graveyard behind the house. I also do this...

It hardly feels like it should be time to leave for home tomorrow, but Paris had been an amazing adventure from the second I arrived. I have made many new friends, and can definately day I expereinced the warmth of the expat community here.

We arrived Wednesday at 8:30am and promptly dropped off our luggage and went off to explore Montparnasse. Crêperie Josselin fit the bill for a big hearty breakfast, and we were so thrilled at how nice and welcoming the staff were. The buckwheat crêpe was as big as my head and one of the best I've ever had.

Being so close to Montparnasse cemetary we went on a meandering visit down the streets and between the graves, looking at the details on the sepulchres and monuments. Coming from a culture where people are burried under small decorated slabs of stone, it was easy to admire the craftmanship and devotion people put into their rememberances here.

Feeling like a spot of people watching we headed to Café de Flore. Touristy, yes, but still a great street facing location and it isn't lacking in atmosphere. After a café au lait and a pot of tea we explored a bit of St Germain de Prés and headed back to the hotel to have dinner there. We called it an early night, because the next day was the K&K Bastille Day Picnic, and we knew we'd be out and about all day and needed the rest.